I Am Here

What is a tourist? Someone who watches, waits and contemplates or someone who is lazy? I am both but now that I am here there is no road block standing in my way.

I am here through the light and darkness even the                                                           struggles and pain. 
I am always here, 
                           but perhaps not here for you
                                                         or even myself, 
  but through it all I know that I must be here and not there.      
          Because there means the past, and I hope to never be forgotten
 in such a way that I no longer                              have reason to exist.

      Can you really tell if you are here and not somewhere else? The scrape on your side or the cut on your thumb do you really feel them? How can you be sure you are living and breathing and not in the imagination of a book or a long lost thought doomed to a never have an ending?

 I know that I am living because when I feel lost I can find myself through pain, love, and loneliness. 

                                                                            You really never know your true self until you lose sight of what you think you should be. 

When you doubt yourself and start fighting to understand it unveils the truth of what you are; human and imperfect. 

(Like me for instance I SucK at punctuation and I do it anyways(just): for "fun" Because I want to and no one can scold me or tell me that I am wrong.) 

It is hard to find yourself in a world of uncertainty, yet the one way that has helped me fight my insecurities is to embrace them and move on. 

The world keeps turning and so must everything else. 

I am here because I fricking want to be! Screw other people and their lies I am perfect and so are you. Bam! 

Look at this kewl star I gave you. 

Happy Birthday.